this is kinda embarassing…i can say that i’m already at one-third of my life span {estimated 60}..yet my english is still not improving {bad..bad!}
…yeah..i do admit that..it is actually my faults since i have never wanted to put on some efforts to improve my english skills..neither in reading nor writing..n the worst part will be in communication… 
I am always giving litany of excuses of why i cannot ever be good in english )…
sometimes,i wondered on how I managed to achieve level 5 in my English Placement Test {the highest would be Level 6} during my matriculation time..come to think of it, I really dont deserve it at all..my english is getting worst than ever..being in an international university,supposedly it is the greatest opportunity to improve my english..yeah,we use english as our medium of communication and all lectures are conveyed in English..but still I do not utilize it to the fullest..such a BIG waste..somehow,it relates to my attitudes towards english…If I really want to excel in English, I have to do whatever it takes to use english as much as I can…
Both my parents can communicate well in English especially my mom but whenever everyone gets home, we will start using our mother’s tongue which is Malay to communicate..Surely, we are much comfortable conversing in Malay..There is time when my dad claims that we have to cultivate the English environment in our household..n it works since everybody starts using english..
nonetheless it only lasts for 2 days
this semester, i’m taking English for Academic Purposes as one of my core courses..This is totally different with the one i took in matric since it relates to my subject matter..I have to discuss an issue pertaining my field of study {anything relates to science}..This is going to be much more challenging since u know, I have to include all the scientific terms and besides I have to write a 10-pages working paper {estimated 2500 words}..now I’m lacking of ideas..i keep thinking about it again n again & i can say that i’m a lil bit worried now…how i’m supposed to write a lengthy essay of 2500 words…even if i were to write a one page essay,it is going to take the whole day..how long it takes to complete this working paper? maybe 3 months?? perhaps…
sometimes, i do envy my friends who can write so well in english…they are so good to the extent that we can see the story flows nicely & perfectly..plus the words used are accurate & definite..when i’m going to reach that level?it leaves a big question mark there…
